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Valkyrie1017
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Name: Alexandra
Country: United States
State: Florida
Metro: Orlando
Birthday: 4/26/1985
Gender: Female
Interests: God, my family, youth and womens ministries, surfing, rock climbing, reading, mothering my three lovely "daughters": laura, belle and danielle, veggie pizza, sour gummy worms, jack johnson, watching old movies, anything that is a baby and i can cuddle, and being the godly woman Jesus would have me be.
Expertise: i think the only realy expertise that i have is getting myself into incredibly awkward situations... and perhaps listening to people... i won't say that i always have advice, but i can hold people and let them cry...
Occupation: Student
Industry: Other
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
AIM:  valkyrie1017
Member Since:
3/24/2005
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| i'm st word of life... its amazing God is good! | | |
| so i made the decision to go back and work for word of life. it wasn't a hard one to make if we were just concidering my heart, for it is where my heart has always been, but it was hard if you think practically. it would be rough financially, but i decided to trust God and do what my calling is. Ergun Canor (my hero) defines a calling as this. "Something that doesn't just get you through. Something you live to do. It will be something that is your passion that you cannot do without God." That has always been Word of Life for me. It changed my life and I want to be used like that through the Lord. I knew that it would be tested. Saturday I was in a car accident with Amber. We're both okay... but in a lot of pain. pray for us. | | |
| This is my tribute to the nice girls. To the nice girls who are
overlooked, who become friends and nothing more, who spend hours
fixating upon their looks and their personalities and their actions
because it must be they that are doing something wrong. This is for the
girls who don't give it up on the first date, who don't want to play
mind games, who provide a comforting hug and a supportive audience for
a story they've heard a thousand times. This is for the girls who
understand that they aren't perfect and that the guys they're
interested in aren't either, for the girls who flirt and laugh and
worry and obsess over the slightest glance, whisper, touch, because
somehow they are able to keep alive that hope that maybe... maybe this
time he'll have understood. This is a homage to the girls who laugh
loud and often, who are comfortable in a teeshirt and sweatpants, who
care more than they should for guys who don't deserve their attention.
This is for the girls who have been told that they're too good or too
smart or too pretty, who have been given compliments as a way of
breaking off a relationship, who have ever been told they are only
wanted as a friend.
this is for the girls who have been led on
by words and kisses and touches, all of which were either only true for
the moment, or never real to begin with. This is for the girls who have
allowed a guy into their head and heart and bed, only to discover that
he's just not ready, he's just not over her, he's just not looking to
be tied down; this is for the girls who believe the excuses because
it's easier to believe that it's not that they don't want you, it's
that they don't want anyone. This is for the girls who have had their
hearts broken and their hopes dashed by someone too cavalier to have
cared in the first place; this is for the nights spent dissecting every
word and syllable and inflection in his speech, finally having realized
that it wasn't that he didn't want a relationship: it was that he
didn't want you. I honor you for the night his dog died or his
grandmother died or his little brother crashed his car and you held
him, thinking that if you only comforted him just right, or said the
right words, or rubbed his back in the right way then perhaps he'd
realize what it was that he already had. This is for the night you
realized that it would never happen, and the sunrise you saw the next
morning after failing to sleep.
This is for the "I really like
you, so let's still be friends" comment after you read more into a
situation than he ever intended; this is for never realizing that when
you choose friends, you seldom choose those which make you cry yourself
to sleep. This is for the hugs you've received from your female
friends, for the nights they've reassured you that you are beautiful
and intelligent and amazing and loyal and truly worthy of a great guy;
this is for the despair you all felt as you sat in the aftermath of
your tears, knowing that that night the only companionship you'd have
was with a pillow and your teddy bear. This is for the girls who have
been used and abused, who have endured what he was giving because at
least he was giving something; this is for the stupidity of the nights
we've believed that something was better than nothing, though his
something was nothing we'd have ever wanted. This is for the girls who
have been satisfied with too little and who have learned never to
expect anything more: for the girls who don't think that they deserve
more, because they've been conditioned for so long to accept the scraps
thrown to them by guys.
This is what I don't understand. Men
sit and question and whine that girls are only attracted to the mean
guys, the guys who berate them and belittle them and don't appreciate
them and don't want them; who use them for sex and think of little else
than where their next conquest will be made. Men complain that they
never meet nice girls, girls who are genuinely interested and
compelling, who are intelligent and sweet and smart and beautiful; men
despair that no good women want to share in their lives, that girls
play mind games; that girls love to keep them hanging. Yet, men, I ask
you: were you to meet one of these genuinely interested, thrillingly
compelling, interesting and intelligent and sweet and beautiful and
smart girls, were you to give her your number and wait for her to
call... and if you were to receive a call from her the next day and
she, in her truthful, loyal, intelligent and straightforward nice girl
fashion, were to tell you that she finds you intriguing and attractive
and interesting and worth her time and perhaps material from which she
could fashion a boyfriend, would you or would you not immediately call
your friends to tell them of the "stalker chick" you'd met the night
prior, who called you and wore her heart on her sleeve and told the
truth? And would you, or would you not, refuse to make plans with her,
speak with her, see her again, and once again return to the bar or club
or party scene and search once more for this "nice girl" who you just
cannot seem to find? Because therein lies the truth, guys: we nice
girls are everywhere. But you're not looking for a nice girl. You're
not looking for someone genuinely interested in your intramural
basketball game, or your anatomy midterm grade, or that argument you
keep having with your father; you're looking for a quick fix, a night
when you can pretend to have a connection with another human being
which is just as disposable as the condom you were using during it.
So
don't say you're on the lookout for nice girls, guys, when you pass us
up on every step you take. so don't say you're looking for a
relationship: relationships take time and energy and intent, three
things we're willing to extend - - but in return, we're looking for
compassion and loyalty and trust, three things you never seem willing
to express. Maybe nice guys finish last, but in the race they're
running they're chasing after the whores and the sluts and the
easy-targets... the nice girls are waiting at the finish line with
water and towels and a congratulatory hug (and yes, if she's a nice
girl and she likes you, the sweatiness probably won't matter), hoping
against hope that maybe you'll realize that they're the ones that you
want at the end of that silly race.
So maybe it won't last
forever. Maybe some of those guys in that race will turn in their
running shoes and make their way to the concession stand where we're
waiting; however, until that happens, we still have each other, that
silly race to watch, and all the chocolate we can eat (because what's a
concession stand at a race without some chocolate?)
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| the Lord is so good. this weekend i had a friend come up here and stay with me for a few days. he was a friend in high school, but we were never really close. we were in rotc togeather and he was my surfing buddy, but that was about it. we never dated or anything like that. we were just too different. i was the innocent little preachers daughter, and although his dad is a pastor, we couldn't be more different. he went wild in high school and even more so after we graduated. i haven't seen or talked to him since we grauated almost four years ago. two weks ago he found me on facebook, then he comes to visit. his story pours out and i just start praying that the Lord will give me his words to say. i can't go into details, because they are his details, but what i can tell you is that the Lord is working. he didn't ask the Lord into his life, but i can tell he is thinking. please keep him in your prayers. his name is stephen and i care about him so much! just pray. | | |
| so the Lord is doing so much in my life right now. there are so many things that i have just been blind to over the past few years. do you ever find yourself praying about things but you aren't doing it because you really believe that the Lord is going to answer your prayer but because it's the "right thing to do"? there are so many things that i have been praying about that it seems like God is not only not answering them but exacty the opposite. and i came to realize a few different things. #1 i havent believed that God would answer my prayers because there was someone in my life that put me so low on his priority list (even though this person expressed verbally everyday that they cared about me) that i started to believe that was where i belonged. i believed that i wasn't important enough to matter. when did i stop thinking of God as God? i don't know. #2 i realized was that there is so much going on in my life but i didn't go to anyone for help. there are two different reasons for that. the first one is that i didn't believe i was important enough to bother my parents or anyone else with what was going on. the second was that i was just too proud to go to them because i didn't think i could handle the rejection. that brings us back to the prayer thing. in 1st peter it says that the Lord opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. it's weird i was too proud yet i thought i wan't important enough to bother them... this is why everything has just been going down the tubes. the Lord has been stoping things in my life because i wouldn't ask anything of those around me. i was too proud to go to anyone. the Lord is so good. i finally went to my parents with things and i feel like things are on their way to healing. my dad told me that this is what they have been praying for 3 years. it feels good... there is still a long way to go... learing about being humble and realizing that i am important enough to God and my family to go to them... | | |
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